Hi there, bighead.

I’m Loudt.

My Mission Statement® for each of my articles is to create a potion of hilarious, educational sardonicism that will dopamine-hit you into having the smartest opinion in the room. That way you can finally stop wearing a bonnet as a replacement for being interesting.

Here’s some cool stuff people have said about me:

That Matt Damon joke is way funnier in context.

It’s true, I’m funny. But if annoying could fly, I’d be a jet.

I bet Michael Caine’s asshole has never received this kind of attention before.

I suppose I could’ve used a real one, but I really wanted to tell you about my CAPTCHA skills.

The best one.